Did you know that there are about 10 million single moms in the USA that raise children younger than 18? So, obviously when you meet a woman on the street or in a cafe there is a chance that she has a kid or even two. Does it scare you, or not? Let’s see, when dating a single mom is a good idea.
What you should know about single mothers
Families with a single parent are not new for our society. However, there is a major disproportion. For example, according to Wikipedia in the USA 83% of single parent families are single mothers and only 17% are single fathers.
And this statistics is pretty much the same in most of the countries of Western Europe and Australia. Therefore single mothers are no longer news for our society. Though, some time ago it was a big deal. Luckily, not anymore.
It is also important to understand why exactly the child is raised without the father. Here are 3 main reasons: divorced or separated (45%), never married (34%), widowed (2%) and other (19%).
Top 5 things to know before dating a single mom
1. Her kid is her top priority
It may sound obvious but it is the main thing you should know before dating a woman that has a child or children.
She is most likely torn between raising a child, her job and household chores. Free time is extremely precious for her. Thus, if she gives it to you it means a lot.
Most likely she has no time for flirting and dalliance. The woman that has a kid takes it seriously. Though, of course there are some exceptions when she is tired and just wants to relax. But this happens quite rarely.
2. There can be her ex around
Some men forget about this but in most of the cases there is a biological father around. He can be a good or bad person, but he may appear from time to time.
Usually when the couple breaks up father keeps seeing his kid. They spend some time together. Sometimes he comes on birthdays.
But the main thing you have to realize is that she is forced to continue communication with her ex. They discuss the child’s schedule, interests and future (interests, education, etc).
3. She looks at you as a man and a father
Obviously you cannot deny the fact that when you date a single mom she “interviews” you for 2 positions simultaneously: her boyfriend and the father for her child.
As it was repeatedly mentioned she has no time for jokes. She likes you if she is with you. But also you have to get along with her baby. Otherwise it will not work.
4. She may have different values
What do you think the single mother values the most? Maybe some expensive presents? In fact – not really.
Indeed, the busy life they live changes their values.
Women start to appreciate simple things like restful sleep, silence, warm hugs, glass of good wine. Also, they will be super grateful if one makes her life easier and helps around the house, with kids, in the kitchen, etc.
5. Quite a little room for spontaneous ideas
Indeed, when you date a woman that has a kid you have to realize that she has a super busy schedule.
She probably has a job, she takes her child to school, doctors, sports. etc. Also, she needs some time for herself, like a haircut, nails, eyelashes. And above all, she has to take care of her house.
Therefore it will be hard to cram any spontaneous idea into her schedule, no matter how awesome it is.
Tips and Rules for Dating a Single Mom
Here is an interesting statistic that shows the percentage of families with a single mother in the USA.
For some reason Louisiana and Mississippi have the highest rates 11%+, while the average around the USA is 7.51%.
Even though the stats in different regions may differ, there are some rules to date a single mother.
1. Don’t expect sex on the first date. And on the second one, and the third one… You have to understand that she definitely will not take you to her place and will not stay at your place on first dates.
2. Get along with her child. She will be extremely happy if you are kind with her kid. If you don’t like kids don’t even try to start dating her.
3. Respect her time. As it was mentioned before, she is a busy person with a tough schedule. Don’t be too pushy and penetrate her life gradually.
4. Try to make her life easier and you will get rewarded. Try to find the spots where you can help her. For example, cleaning, cooking, playing with the kid, etc. Saved time and energy will be given to you.
5. Do not forbid the child to see the biological father. It can be hard, but you cannot stand between them. Unless, of course the father is dangerous for the kid.
Pros of dating a single mom
There are some indisputable advantages of dating a single mom.
1. If she falls for you, she really likes you. She doesn’t have time for fooling around. So, if she is with you, then she sees the future with you.
2. Plenty of free time for yourself. For some men this will be a major advantage. You will not have to spend hours of chatting with her. Do you like some sports, hanging out with friends, reading some books with a glass of wine. In most of the cases you will not feel any limits in that.
3. She is very practical. Single mom certainly knows how to save money. Also she doesn’t spend too much time in front of the mirror. Above all, they don’t pay too much attention to the little things.
4. Single mom is experienced in lots of stuff. This person went through the fire. Hence, she has plenty of experience in relationships, housekeeping, time management, etc.
5. Clean house and delicious home cooked meal. In most of the cases single mothers can cook pretty well. Also, she has to keep her home clean for her child. So, it is good news for those who like a good home cooked meal and cleanliness in the house.
6. Every effort is rewarding. Every effort that makes her life easier will be rewarded.
7. Got your own kids? It may be good for your relationship. The life of a single father is also not a piece of cake. Thus, if you unite your efforts and build one big and healthy family can make you both happy.
Final thoughts about dating a single mom
Obviously, there are some pros and cons of dating a single mom. However, men have to realize that in the 21st century it is no longer a big deal.
Though, there are some things to consider, like whether you like kids, if you are ok about having her ex around and the fact that she has a lack of free time for you.
If you can live with that then enjoy all the advantages of having a relationship with the single mom. Good luck.